Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm like, not good at living.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
