Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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