so explain again why im purple
no
I just pynch a tree in the face
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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