YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize