just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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