You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
