Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize