in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
