If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
