I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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