That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
