seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
