I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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