I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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