This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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