I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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