Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
