Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
