Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
