This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
