with your own penis?
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I cut my penus on the lid.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
It's never too late to be topless.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
