But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
