Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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