I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize