how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
