What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
