my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I need to wash the frat house off of me
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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