I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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