I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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