i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
