Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
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