after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
