This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
