If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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