It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
