This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
