everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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