We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
