The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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