i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
whose parrot is this?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
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