What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Everyone says I win the strip club
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
