Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
