her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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