great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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