kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
