Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Randomize
