He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
