It's Friday. Sex?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
