Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
