Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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